You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
