jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
