yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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