Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize