my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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