I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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