yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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