I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
