she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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