why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
