He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
