I am spending my child support on dildos
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
