We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize