Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Randomize
