I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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