help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
