forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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