dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
