What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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