You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
