It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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