You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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