she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
