If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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