You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Hippo gnu deer
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
