im six kinds of drunk right now
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize