it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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