i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
