You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
