worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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