Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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