they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
