gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
