He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
His nipple licking is glorious
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