explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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