A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
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