I puked a lego.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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