I hope mine doesn't look like that
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
