do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize