i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
