And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
