Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
