I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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