He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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