everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Randomize
