we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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