My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
