Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
