why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
