You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize