I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
